Sasuke's Dead Pets
by riona18
Summary: You all think that Itachi is the main reason of Sasuke frail mental state. Well guess agian.. Find out about all of Sasukes dearest pets.
1. Pet 1: Pinky

Freetalk: HI im riona18... im kinda new to this fanfic thing so i wanted to start off with something my friend cuzimcrazylikethat and Miss Kanji Babe thought was funny so hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer :I do not own Naruto

Okay people.. in this fanfic Sasuke has a sister.. just play along with me…

One night back when the clan was still alive, Itachi was talking to his foolish little sister Mimi.

"Is it possible for Sasuke to dream about anything OTHER than his dead pets" complained Mimi.

"Not after all of them 'mysteriously' ran away" replied Itachi.

"NOOO! PINKY!", Screamed Sasuke in the other room.

"Oh yeah, I remember Pinky… I never liked that cat.. wander what happened to him?", questioned Mimi.

" Hehehe.. I enoyed drowning that cat", said Itachi, giddy as a school boy.

" Why Itachi why, so we have to listen wonder around aimlessly looking for a dead cat" complained Mimi.

"Exactly" replied a satisfied Itachi.

AN: Im not to sure about this chapter but there will be others.. please keep reading and reveiwing.

riona18


	2. Pet 2: Goldie

Free Talk: Thanks for the reveiws. Now that im condident more chapters will be posted.

Disclaimer: Unfortunetly, I do noy own Naruto.

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"Why did Goldie have to run away!" cried Sasuke in his sleep.

"Mom killed that one."said Itachi.

"Yeah and Sasuke, being Sasuke, beleived mom's story." Mimi said rolling her eyes.

2 years ago.

_"Mom, what happened to Goldie?" questioned Sasuke._

_"hge ran away sweetheaart" his mother replied._

_"Where to?Can we go look for him?" he asked._

_"No sweetheart. He went to a better place." smiled Sasuke's mother._

"What an igit." said Itachi.

"Do you know what happened to it?" asked Mimi.

"Yeah, first she drowned the fish." replied Itachi.

"She what?" replied a confuzzled Mimi.

"She drowned the fish" replied Itachi.

"How the heck do you do that?" questioned Mimi.

" I dunno, but she did it after she poisioned the water. After drowning it, she flushed down the toilet." replied Itachi grinning ear to ear.

"Wow, this family is pretty violent." said a content Mimi.

Freetalk: Ok heres chapter two. please R&R.

riona18


	3. Pet 3: Fiona

Freetalk: Hello, i hope that you are all reading and enjoying the story. Thank you all who have reviewed. It helps alot.

Disclamier: RegrettablyI do not own Naruto.

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"Ahh, where's Fiona's head!" Sasuke shrilled.

"Ahh, Fiona. That was your handy work, was it not?" asked Itachi.

"Oh that rabbit had it coming." said an extremly vexed Mimi.

"Really?" said Itachi.

3 years ago

_"ARGH! Thats the last time you will ever bite me." sceramed Mimi._

_Mimi charged through to kitchen pulling Fiona by her ears. In the kitchen, Mimi pulls out a butchers knife and the cutting board._

_"Damned rabbit. I'll show you who's boss."muttered Mimi under uner breath._

_Mimi,with the decapitated rabbit,walks into the room where her mother is._

_"Mom,where can i hide Fiona from Sasuke" said Mimi as if nothing had happened._

_Oh my goodness. What did you do to the rabbit?" yelled the hysarical mother._

_"I was sick of her always bitting me. So i found a solution." said a very compossed Mimi._

"You say that I,me, am violent for drowning Pinky. You chopped off the rabbits head for crips sake."said Itachi, proud of his foolish little sister.

"Yes and all i can say is, my plan has finally come to fruition."

Freetalk: There you go. Please R&R


	4. Pet 4: Polly

**AN: sorry it been a long time. Schools been really busy latley..Im in the band so we have had alot of functions latley..**

**Disclaimer:****Disappointingly****I do not own Naruto,**

"Daddy, stop stop! You're hurting him. You're hurting Polly!" a traumatized Sasuke screams.

" Ah Polly, the family parrot" said Mimi.

" Yes that was fun to watch" said Itachi with a grin on his face.

_1 Year Ago_

_Mr. Uchiha walks through the room to feed Polly the parrot._

_"Here is your banana."_

_Polly takes the banana. Afterwards Polly decides to eat Mr. Uchiha's hand as well._

_"You damned bird! I'll Kill You!" yelled the furious man. Mr. Uchiha takes the bird out of the cage and strangles it violently screaming " Does Polly want a cracker **now**?" Mr. Uchiha continues to strangle the poor bird in front of Sasuke. Sasuke could see all the bird feathers on the floor. Mr. Uchiha drops the dead bird on the floor and scream " Come clean up this mess!"_

_End _

" Poor Sasuke, that must have been Horrible." said Mimi.

"No, not really, no. That bird had it coming. I mean honestly. the only person he didnt bite was you" stated Itachi.

"Thats cause im not cruel to animals" replied Mimi.

"Really, and what about Fiona?" questioned Itachi.

"What about her?" said an irritated Mimi.

**An: well here it is. As one of you asked part of the reason the chapters are so short is cause my parents hate the fact that i watch anime. they hate it. so i have a time limit to write these things or ther wise im busted. plz reveiw. **


	5. Pet 5: Muffins

Authors note: Sorry I have not updated in a while. I've been traveling a lot and have tons of summer work for school.

This chapter takes place the next morning.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

The next morning the Uchiha family was sitting at the breakfast table.

"How did you sleep last night Sasuke?" asked Itachi.

"Fine." Sneered Sasuke as he played with his hamster, Muffins.

"You sound like that hamster if it was to be put in a microwave" laughed Mimi.

After breakfast Sasuke went into the kitchen with the Muffins.

"I wonder what you would sound like in a microwave?" , Sasuke muttered, to his hamster. "How many seconds should I put you in for?"

Sasuke took the hamster out of his cage and put it into the microwave. Once in the microwave, Sasuke set the timer for 10 seconds. He pressed the start button. After 3 seconds the hamster started to squeal. It squealed for 2 more seconds before Sasuke took out the Hamster.

"It's going to be okay," said Sasuke to Muffins.

Later that day Itachi walked through the kitchen and smelled chicken.

"What is the smell?" he thought.

Itachi walked over to the refrigerator and open the door only to see a dead hamster. Itachi looked for a moment.

"…"

"…"

"WHAT DA FUCK!" screamed Itachi.

Sasuke walks in and starts accusing Itachi of atrocious crimes.

"What did you do to my Muffins!" screamed Sasuke.

"I didn't do anything!" yelled Itachi.

The hamster had committed suicide due to the trauma of being out into a microwave.

Sasuke and Itachi stared at the body. It was not long until both boys picked the hamster up and put it into the pot for dinner. They surely did enjoy dinner that night.


End file.
